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Jim

Team "Because Rasebar" Hampton Roads Virginia

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We are a group of Navy (mostly) pilots that came together to create a Lemons racecar rasebar. Our priorities for lemons are: 1. Have fun. 2. Make the race video. 3. Be competitive.

 

So far we made the first 2. Maybe we can work on priority number 3 at Chumpcar? Doubtful.

 

This is our team concept:

In the fall of 2015, a group of friends assembled around a rickety mass of rusty sheetmetal that somewhat resembled a BMW 733i. The "car" as it was being referred to, had seemingly appeared out of nowhere in a parking lot next to the aptly named "Bimmer Rescue" bmw shop in Richmond, VA. The shop owner, Patrick, looking more like a mad scientist with his long unwashed messy hair than a business owner, was spouting off his aspirations of restoring the 1985 luxury car piece of junk, while Andy,  studdering hillbilly turned Naval Aviator, argued somewhat incoherently about how perfect of a racecar it would be, saying things like "but look how mediocre it is!" and "the judges will think we are so slow!". Tony interjected, picture that high school dropout used car salesmen with the cowboy boots that broke your sisters heart when she was a freshmen in high school, "lets just drink some beers and think about it". The next morning the crew woke up, passed out on the oily floor to find a huge pile of seats, carpet, trim, and various luxury gadgets and gizmos next to what used to be an "awesome" car. Upon further investigation, the crew noted the misspelled word "Rasecar" had been painted on the back of the car. The rear tires, with the differential broke off its mounting, had about a -10 degree camber and the smell of stale burnt rubber and gasoline was in the air. Stumbling into the daylight, the crew discovered the entire parking lot littered with skidmarks and beer-cans. As evidenced by the skidmarks were standing burnouts, skidpad style donuts, power-slides, drifting, j-turns, and various pieces of rusty metal lying about that had likely fallen off the car. Over breakfast the crew spoke of plans for the car, and important things ranging from "how do we fix the differential?" and "how do we make this car run for more than a few hours without catching on fire?" to "how are we going to afford all that beer?". Most of the why questions were answered with "Why? Because Racecar". And so sticking with the original spelling of the word racecar, "Because Rasecar" was born. Over the next few weeks Matt, nicknamed "Opa!" and his miniature version sidekick Sam, nickname "Stamp" due to his drunken mushroom stamps found on windows the morning after came into the fold. Drunk Donnie came soon after, and it wasnt until he was a team member for over a month did the team discover that he doesn't even know how to drive a stick. And this brings us to current day problems facing the team. For Donnie to race, Patrick suggested the team: 1. Take Donnie's beer away for the race, and 2. Just put the car in third gear and tell him not to shift. Another problem is every time the crew tries to work on the car, they end up drinking instead. For instance, one morning they woke up, and much to their surprise and dismay, instead of a roll cage being built in the night, a bar complete with a tap and kegorater had been installed on the trunk. The team quickly adopted its new and possibly final name "Because RaseBar". Today, the teams groupme is filled with memes such as "Why no girlfriend? / Because Rasebar" and "Why no money? / Because Rasebar" "Why drunk on Wednesday / Because Rasebar" "Why angry wife / Because Rasebar". The current problem the team faces is how do they get this "bar" drive-able when all they seem to be able to do is get drunk and destroy things. This is a challenge the group will face going forward. One thing is for sure, however, should this "bar" actually make it to lemons, it may not be fast, it may not finish the race, heck it might even catch on fire, but at least it will have cheap cold beer.

 

P.S. Should the bar catch on fire, you can rest assured that pictures will be taken, and a meme will be created saying "Why bar on fire? / Because Rasebar"


 

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Jim, we're around the corner from you in Cpeake. Are you going to be coming out to the VIR 24? And what squadron are you with?

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